Stopping sad memories from hurting us
Dwelling on negative experiences can be fatal – but scientists suggest we can change that.
We have all experienced moments that we wish we could forget.
As we age, we continue to ruminate negatively on the past and get angry. This can affect our body and mind, and even kill us.
Scientists speculate this tendency to persistently recall negative memories could be an evolutionary defence mechanism. From an evolutionary perspective, it's crucial to remember highly stressful situations to avoid them in the future. However, it can also lead to psychological impediments such as depression and anxiety.
How can we move beyond negative memories? Is it possible to change what we remember?
Thankfully, the answer to that is we can adapt our memories and those changes are long-lasting.
At Columbia University in the United States, nearly 300 participants were given memory tasks where they recalled positive aspects of a negative memory, either written or verbally, over periods of 24 hours, one week, and two months.
The researchers observed they were able to shift the focus of the negative experiences to more positive ones. This led to beneficial changes in how these events were remembered.
When asked what inspired her study, researcher Megan Speer said her sad memories of her father dying of a stroke were changed when started to focus on a silver lining.
“I was happy that he didn’t have to continue to suffer for an extended period of time after experiencing the stroke and was ultimately in a better place,” she said.
“Over time, I noticed that this new insight would pop into my head when re-visiting this memory. This made me realise that it’s possible for this positive reframing to actually reshape our memory in a beneficial way.”
Dr Speer’s study confirmed that finding positive meaning in past negative memories has a long-lasting impact.
We can change what we remember by allowing us to recall more positive aspects of an experience.
A real-world example of this might involve reflecting on a past break-up with a romantic partner, evoking negative emotions.
One way to find positive meaning is to focus on the positive aspects or look for new insight about the event.
You might realise the break-up inspired you to re-evaluate what traits and characteristics you want in a romantic partner. This insight might have pushed you to seek out someone who was a better match for you.
When remembering the break-up in the future, you may now also remember the new positive insight you gained, making it less distressing to think about.
The researchers say the ability to find new meaning enhances positive emotion, fewer depression symptoms, and faster recovery from stress – each of which helps build resilience to future adversity.
Positive emotion can also broaden our cognitive perspective, which can lead to better decision-making, enhanced creativity, and adaptive coping.
Getting angry – even for just a few minutes – can affect your blood vessels, and lead to heart attacks and strokes. Perhaps that’s why some people experience these events during emotional outbursts.
In another Colombia University study, volunteers were asked to think about past experiences that made them angry while their circulatory health was measured. None of them had a heart attack or stroke but they did experience impaired blood vessel functioning that has been linked to such events.
Lead researcher Daichi Shimbo said this suggests that intense emotions could contribute to cardiac events in people who already have poor health.
Other kinds of research have suggested that heart attacks can be triggered by intense emotional experiences. One study found that in the hour before a heart attack, people were more than twice as likely to have experienced anger or emotional upset as during the same hour-long period the previous day.
In Dr Shimbo’s study, people who were asked to think and speak about a recent experience that made them angry had a fall in their blood vessel dilation capacity that lasted about 40 minutes.
“It is possible that [these effects] occur routinely throughout the day or week with potentially long-term consequences,” the researchers concluded.
“Repeated episodes of a negative emotion may affect cardiovascular physiology over time, causing… irreversible damage.”
The blood vessel response didn’t happen for people assigned to the anxiety or sadness experiences, or for those in the control group. And there was no difference for any of the groups in the other measurements.
Researchers concede they still don’t understand how emotions can affect the circulatory system, and say it isn’t always easy to stop getting angry.
However, they suggest that people with serious problems seek anger management interventions.
One researcher said, “While not all the mechanisms on how psychological states impact cardiovascular health have been elucidated, this study clearly takes us one step closer to defining such mechanisms.”
Related reading: Columbia, New Scientist
